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Via Email“How Was Your Trip?” and other Conversation Questions
I hear this question a lot since I returned from 3 weeks in the Bahamas and Florida. The best part was a 6-night kayaking and camping adventure with family.
We paddled through mangroves, sailed across stingray flats, snorkeled around elkhorn coral and bluehead wrasses, scooped up sand dollars, swapped poems by firelight, and wished on shooting stars. My tribe nicknamed me Potcake.
Oh, it wasn’t all glorious: a scorpion bit Whitney twice; 3 of us cut our feet on shells and glass; and from sunset to sunrise, mosquitos and no-see-ums feasted on our uncovered body parts. We nearly peed on our toes, and we banged pots to scare off Wilbur, the massive pink pig who shared our “deserted” island. He sneaked up on us, and more than not wanting him to carry off our vittles, we never wanted him to surprise us squatting in the bushes.
I didn’t miss a toilet or comfortable bed. I missed a fresh-water rinse. My hair, though cleaned with No-Rinse Shampoo, always felt thick and sticky, hyped up on Super Salt Body. When I shampooed after the trip (AHHHHH!), it felt like two-thirds of my hair had fallen out.
So what do I say when people ask, “How was your trip?”
I say, “It was great.”
Period.
For most folks, that’s enough. All they want to know is that pirates didn’t carry me off, and a passing stingray didn’t nail me to the reef.
Maybe it’s stingy of me to share so little. Do you think so?
Sometimes I bore myself with a one-word answer, and I have to say more. Then I might describe the nursery of 4-inch conchs, helter-skelter, half out of the water at low tide.
If there’s space for more information, sometimes I add details. You know what I mean by “space”? It’s somebody’s willingness to listen; it’s their ability to care; it’s the time to share. In my opinion, of course.
Then I say, “The best part was spending time with my family, including my cousin Vicki who married Cathy, her partner of 27 years, and turned the trip into a honeymoon. I loved meeting my first cousin Nan.”
By way of showing how much fun Nan is, I might add, “After paddling for hours, Nan’s in the middle of the bonefish flats, squatting by the kayak, saying, ‘I’ve met 3 presidents, and now I’m peeing in my pants.’”
I love a juicy quotation. I squatted, too, but didn’t generate a sound bite. (Nan, thanks for yours.)
Here’s what I’ve learned about the conversation question ”How was your trip?”
The answer is what you make it. The question is super open-ended, so you could reply with a single word—”great”—or with a detailed description.
What makes me happy is something memorable and specific to hang my hat on. So the next time one of my friends goes traveling, I’ll won’t say, “How was your trip?” I’ll ask, “What were some highlights from your trip?”
My neighbor Faye leaves for Italy and Greece tomorrow. When she asked what to bring me, I said, “Stories.”
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